Hot 100 - My Update

I've been struggling this week. Had been making great progress since I started back on my getting-healthy plan this past June 29, but suddenly, everything overwhelmed me.

My allergies to hay (and we have to have hay for our livestock), a sprained arm (preventing me from working weights per doc's office orders), migraines, carpal tunnel getting bad, depression, invasion of mice in my garage and house, my Kid's symptoms are worse (ADD, ADHD, tourette's, autism .. no two doctors agree), getting everything ready for Winter, chickens not laying enough eggs, goat not giving enough milk, finding someone to breed my goats to, money problems,a bruised right eye from who knows (woke up yesterday morning and there it was), finding the money to get enough hay and feed and firewood and propane to last through the Winter, massive amounts of boxes still unpacked from our move here last March, nervous about leaving home and seeing family next month (haven't seen some of them in many years), cooking massive quantities of food for Hubby and not eating any of it myself, helping my Kid with his 9th grade classes, and major family drama. All of this, and some intense cravings to binge on peanut butter, cheeseburgers, chocolate and cheese.

But I talked with an old friend Tuesday afternoon. I knew Sheila when we were kids all the way through high school. Then we lost touch after high school graduation until a few weeks ago. It was really good to talk with someone who still pictures me young, healthy and thin. Not old, gray, and fat, with disabilities. Just reliving memories and catching up helped tremendously, putting my feet back on the ground, on the path to getting healthy. Which is why I do this blog.

That brings up another point: Yes, I write this blog to journal my experience and help me figure out what's going on in my head. And to make me accountable for what goes on with me and my getting-healthy plan. But there's another part of me ... a BIG part ... that wants, for the lack of a better word, attention. I'm sad to say that I really look forward to comments and constructive criticism and especially the encouragement. It's not an ego booster for me; it's more that I need a little bit of a cheering section.

See, I'm a bit of agoraphobic. I've been this way for about 10 years, although most people don't know that about me. It takes a lot to make myself leave my home. (Like yesterday I took my Kid to the library and out to lunch and did some shopping; we considered it a reward for helping me so much this week and for working hard on his behavior. And a break for me. Unfortunately, Village Inn doesn't have nutrition information for their food so when I got home, I used my own spreadsheet and wow! I **really** went over calories! With JUST an OMELET?!)

Anyway, I don't usually have daily contact with many people; this blog and the blogosphere is my contact with humans, however weird it seems.

Sorry. I rambled. Back to original thought: thanks to Sheila for reaching out and helping me to start getting over my hurdle. And thanks to everyone who left such wonderful words of encouragement over the last few days.

Now ...
Goal Check:

Weight down to 185 (from 214.6 last Thurs):
Weigh-in this morning is 212.8, a loss for the week of 1.8 pounds.

Exercycle 3 hours a week:
I didn't exercycle Friday through Monday.
Tuesday: 60:52 minutes, 13.63 miles, burned 500 calories.
Wednesday: 30 minutes, 6.47 miles, burned 237 calories

Write/Finish 3 E-Books:
Didn't write Friday through Tuesday.
Wednesday: Spent about an hour working on an e-book.

6 comments:

Just Me said...

Sounds like you are having a bit of a struggle this week, but now with your weight - you lost - hooray!

You've got a lot of things on your plate, but little by little they'll get better...at least I hope so. I know what you mean about allergies to hay though. My hubby is allergic to hay and we have 3 rabbits and they NEED hay.

Isn't it amazing how an old friend can brighten your day. Hope you had a lot of laughs together.

So here's a dose of encouragement from me to you today. You have done such a fabulous job losing weight so far. You must feel much more healthy, light, free...

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.
Live the life you have imagined.
-Henry David Thoreau

Vee said...

Thanks Darla. I appreciate it. Vee

Janell said...

Vee, I used to have a similar agoraphobia when my kids were younger. I never got out of the house or rarely. I recall being in a car, driving over a bridge and darn near freaking out. I thought the driver was going to plunge us into the bay.
Scary. The way I got out of the fear was to force myself out. So a shopping trip sounds ideal even if you had to suffer with an omelet. ;-)

Christina said...

You sound like me!! I also like the attention. It is actaully something I plan on talking about as well. I also don't like to leave the house...lots and lots of issues there. I am usually okay if I don't have the children with me though, which is almost never that I am alone.

Michele said...

We all are going to have weeks that w struggle. I sure have (check out life events and declining health if father labels on my blog). Life is tough and so is what you are doing. But, what you are doing, moving toward better health is the most important thing. Without it you got nothing. So, gulp down the bad weeks and keep at it. Your update for the week shows a loss. Excellent. Good for you! In a “bad” week you came out a winner. Michele at http://ruminationsasiuncoverthewomanwithin.blogspot.com/

Veronica said...

I found you through your update link for the Hot 100. Wow, you've had a ROUGH week--and you still managed to lose weight! What a win!! That is very, very cool. I understand what you mean about blogging for attention & needing a cheering section. I would never admit it, but I'm the same way. I don't want people to think I'm blogging for attention so I wouldn't say it. the fact that you just pointed that out makes me really like your for your simple honesty and it doesn't sound like a bad thing when you say it! Good luck with next week--I hope it is a much better one! You're doing great, keep it up.